I took too long to move out from the monster side of myself.
it keep bottling up till one day, it just burst.
and i always thought i am strong enough to handle it,
i'm strong enough to move on and i won't let the monster get hold of me.
i guess i was wrong, totally wrong.
instead of me controlling it, it took control of me.
i lost it. totally lost it.
until a point, i became the monster itself and it scares practically everyone away. people used to look at me with loving eyes, but now people look at me with frustrated eyes.
people used to love my company, but now people avoiding me because all they see is my misery and grief.
it's too heavy that they decided to ignore and let me be.
they found bliss in ignorance.
i realized... and i know whether i like it or not, willing or not ..i have to put a stop to it.
i don't wanna end up building a shield that push people away and having self-pity all my life.
that's when the fun-loving soul inside of me surfaces.
all hell break loose. and now i am picking up the pieces.
it's just like playing WoW.
i am leveling up my confidence to face myself.
to get back to life. to appreciate life.
this post i really wanna thanks these few people that practically smacked me back to reality. these few people are true friends that will never give up on you .. that will never leave u behind and walk ahead...that will keep smacking you till you're awake. these people are so dear to me although, yes we do not really hang out previously but they are there, when you need them. at least ..they are there for me when i am broken.
Jolyn's poem and words acted as my guidance to leveling up my confidence and face it instead of ignoring the problems that are just right under my freaking nose.
James and Maya's patience ...encourage me to gain back the trust that i've lost and thrown aside.
Wai mun's unconditional care and sayang ...that shows me that they are still a lot of people who care.
Julian's spiritual words and prayer.
Nick and Kris ..made me a smiling minnie and encourage to turn back my life into a colorful and fun just like Disneyland. in order to see a smiling Mickey, i have to be a smiling Minnie. (pfft!!)
yeah, these people are very dear to me. thank you for bringing me back to life.
i learned my lesson and yes, the Sabrina is back and enjoying life to the fullest.
it keep bottling up till one day, it just burst.
and i always thought i am strong enough to handle it,
i'm strong enough to move on and i won't let the monster get hold of me.
i guess i was wrong, totally wrong.
instead of me controlling it, it took control of me.
i lost it. totally lost it.
until a point, i became the monster itself and it scares practically everyone away. people used to look at me with loving eyes, but now people look at me with frustrated eyes.
people used to love my company, but now people avoiding me because all they see is my misery and grief.
it's too heavy that they decided to ignore and let me be.
they found bliss in ignorance.
i realized... and i know whether i like it or not, willing or not ..i have to put a stop to it.
i don't wanna end up building a shield that push people away and having self-pity all my life.
that's when the fun-loving soul inside of me surfaces.
all hell break loose. and now i am picking up the pieces.
it's just like playing WoW.
i am leveling up my confidence to face myself.
to get back to life. to appreciate life.
this post i really wanna thanks these few people that practically smacked me back to reality. these few people are true friends that will never give up on you .. that will never leave u behind and walk ahead...that will keep smacking you till you're awake. these people are so dear to me although, yes we do not really hang out previously but they are there, when you need them. at least ..they are there for me when i am broken.
Jolyn's poem and words acted as my guidance to leveling up my confidence and face it instead of ignoring the problems that are just right under my freaking nose.
James and Maya's patience ...encourage me to gain back the trust that i've lost and thrown aside.
Wai mun's unconditional care and sayang ...that shows me that they are still a lot of people who care.
Julian's spiritual words and prayer.
Nick and Kris ..made me a smiling minnie and encourage to turn back my life into a colorful and fun just like Disneyland. in order to see a smiling Mickey, i have to be a smiling Minnie. (pfft!!)
yeah, these people are very dear to me. thank you for bringing me back to life.
i learned my lesson and yes, the Sabrina is back and enjoying life to the fullest.
to hell to the particular person who took everything from me, because i am back and stronger than ever. You robbed enough 2 years back. you might think you've won, but too bad. i'm still alive.
still alive,
nana.
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